"NO!" My mother and Oma would simultaneously say. With a great grandmother who died at 93 years of age, I often wondered if I would ever reach or even ever dream of hitting the 100 mark. My mother and Oma certainly refused to even go near that number.
During the fourteen years I spent at Santa Laurensia School, my parents would joke how generous I was with my grades. Instead of getting perfect scores, most of my marks were in the nineties, even less. Soon or later, I wondered if they were right to say that subconsciously I avoid getting hundreds for some unknown reason.
|Here's to hundreds of articles ahead!|
At seventeen I began my time at Sarah Lawrence, a school that is infamous for their lack of grading system. Without letter grades or numbers to measure my performance, I perfected my art, whether it was in psychological research, theatre or neuroscience. I felt liberated to truly be the best that I could be, even though I spent a good amount of time explaining to people outside of the SLC universe about teacher's evaluations and the liberal arts education.
So, what is it about 100?
Why I am cutting myself short from a socially constructed notion of perfection?
Almost universally, turning a hundred years old, being part of the top 100th, reaching a hundred on a test, amount of subscribers, number of pages, or in pounds, is a good thing. Even, racing a car at 100 km/h without crashing is considered to be an achievement.
Now, at a hundred posts I can say that turning a hundred might just be better than I thought it would be. Though, I am not a hundred percent certain (Hah!), I pat myself on the back and massage my tired hands. I am satisfied with what I have written and the responses that have trickled in, thus far. The journey has been rocky, trust me, when you don't hear so much as a squeak, and all you can see are numbers, your mind begins to play tricks on you.
Some moments, this blog seems futile, other times it oddly excites me. This 100th post would not have happened without those who respond and the other whatever hundred people who read it daily. The unknown, as I hope many of you have learned, is a peculiar source of drive.
Finally, as my writing teacher once said, reaching a hundred is an accomplishment in itself. And for once, I will surrender and take her word for it.
*Author owns rights to the photos above