Friday, November 1, 2013

Halloween Sucks: Confessions of a Halloween Lover

Halloween is lurking behind most shopfronts in NYC, trying real hard to suck me into buying an entire outfit that is (most likely) too crazy or revealing to be worn a second time. As a child in Indonesia, I remember being a bit sad and insecure for being a witch made out of leftover fabric and cardboard, whilst looking on at a fabulously dressed spidery girl with mesh and tulle and all that is wonderful about Halloween. In high school, I based my school presidential electoral vote on the possibility of there being a Halloween Ball. I was a Halloween freak, to the point where I chose to scare the life out of guests by having them walk through a haunted house before arriving at my sweet seventeen.

Be a Princess for Halloween?

Each year, as my personality changed, my Halloween costume plans changed. Before turning eight, most of my costumes, which were actually worn on my birthday (October 19, close enough to October 31), were inspired by Disney Princess. Please keep in mind that this is Indonesia, where not a single Disney store ever existed. On that note, being away from a physical sanctuary where Halloween is outlandishly and traditionally celebrated, perhaps, made it that much more enticing. As a girl growing up in Indonesia, where Halloween is practically banned or ignored, I craved for this forbidden apple.

Ideas for Haunted House?
In 2011, when I finally resided in the U.S., I had some spark inside me to create a makeup look to celebrate the occasion. However, that flame soon fizzled. By Fall 2012, I could not be bothered to think of a costume idea or even go out trick or treating. This year, I could feel some development in my rate of excitement, but it is definitely insufficient to get into an elaborate costume, slap on makeup, and walk out the door. Maybe, if the night isn't that chilly, I would make an appearance, but it seems quite unlikely at this moment in time.

So, what changed? How did a girl, who was so obsessed with a celebration become so dull? Is it really an issue of the forbidden fruit? Is something so near, so repulsive? I would suggest that it has everything to do with my identity, the one that attracted me to the school that I currently go to. As a hipster (yes! I said it, alright!), the appeal of celebrating Halloween died down when I realized how mainstream it was. Nowadays, the rules and expectations of Halloween has sucked the fun out of it. People demand a certain amount of effort in your costume and behavior. Suddenly, a holiday that seemed so rebellious is packed with limitations.

Perhaps, I need a refresher course on how to celebrate Halloween. Perhaps, I need to reorient my perspective on how to have fun on October 31st. Perhaps, I just need to find a way to break all of the unwritten and invisible rules.

*Author owns rights to all photos above

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